Or so my husband says. And maybe he's right.
As I transition responsibilities from an extra-curricular activity I've been involved with the last two years, I find myself getting involved with yet another one -- with no breaks in between. And why?
Because I just can't say no? (no)
Because I don't feel as fulfilled if I don't have a few balls juggling in the air? (getting warmer)
Because having my hands in lots of different things of substance make me feel like I'm adding value in the world? (ding, ding, ding, as i put my finger on my nose to indicate "precisely!")
He says that I have a hard time setting boundaries for myself. I call it trying to "step up my life." But sometimes it's to my detriment.
Like when I wake up in the middle of the night remembering that e-mail for work I needed to send before the morning. Or when I feel guilty for not baking those cupcakes from scratch for the kids' pot-luck picnic at preschool, or have a hard time making it on time to their soccer practice. Or when that newsletter deadline for my non-profit is looming and I still haven't gotten the write-up ready for it.
And I get myself all worked up and worked out so that I get tired and am in a tizzy about everything. And then. I get paralyzed. And I end up doing everything and nothing because I don't know what to do next, or where to go. And wonder if I am really just a slacker...mom, wife, employee, non-profit volunteer, whatever. Ever feel like that when you get overwhelmed?
Not that I'm overwhelmed right now or anything. I'm just musing on this in my mellow, reflective state so that next time I get worked up and in a tizzy, I can point to what's driving it. And I can recognize and understand what my natural reaction is under duress and times of general busy-ness. And, of course, I can also be ok with it since I acknowledge, "Oh, ok, that's just how I get in these situations."
Self awareness is good like that, ain't it?
Like when I wake up in the middle of the night remembering that e-mail for work I needed to send before the morning. Or when I feel guilty for not baking those cupcakes from scratch for the kids' pot-luck picnic at preschool, or have a hard time making it on time to their soccer practice. Or when that newsletter deadline for my non-profit is looming and I still haven't gotten the write-up ready for it.
And I get myself all worked up and worked out so that I get tired and am in a tizzy about everything. And then. I get paralyzed. And I end up doing everything and nothing because I don't know what to do next, or where to go. And wonder if I am really just a slacker...mom, wife, employee, non-profit volunteer, whatever. Ever feel like that when you get overwhelmed?
Not that I'm overwhelmed right now or anything. I'm just musing on this in my mellow, reflective state so that next time I get worked up and in a tizzy, I can point to what's driving it. And I can recognize and understand what my natural reaction is under duress and times of general busy-ness. And, of course, I can also be ok with it since I acknowledge, "Oh, ok, that's just how I get in these situations."
Self awareness is good like that, ain't it?
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